Well it's a new year and whatnot...

Lots of things have been happening in my world lately... well, in everybody's world to be sure, but I'm self-absorbed right now, so we'll be talnbout me, #thenkyavurrrymurch.

So this is a post purely to say that there are finna be changes coming, to my blogs, in my life, and in my goals. Don't worry (all seven or eight of y'all that be checkin' for me) it's all for the good. I'm regrouping, refocusing, readjusting and all that kinda stuff. So there will be a brief continuance of my semi-hiatus, and then I'm coming back, all serious and shxt.

In the mean time, can someone explain this to me please?

Wait... Let's let Red Foreman explain it......

Thanks, Red.

Theory Revisited

About a year ago, I wrote a guest blog post for The Latte Mug, NaturallyAlise and Eyesqueen's blog. In light of some of the stupidity I've seen on the web lately (African slave Halloween costumes, Sarah Silverman in blackface), I wanted to repost it here. We need to do better. We need to be better.

"My theory on that is.... "

I say that a lot. Just ask Alise if you don't believe me. I have a theory on almost everything human nature-ish. I think I get it from my mom. She was an observer of people... dare I say, she was an EXPERT observer of people. She almost coulda been an anthropologist or a sociologist or some such thing. (She wasn't though, she was a hairdresser... which is a kissing cousin to bartender in terms of hearing people's life stories and whatnot... but I digress). I also tend to be a bit on the analytical side. I like to peel away until I get to the core of how something works... I must understand the form and the function, if you will. And I tend to worry at things until I feel I do have a grasp on them.

Anyway, add my Theory OCD to my self-diagnosed ADD, and you get an endless train of thought that jumps the track on average every 5 minutes. Which is probably why I love Twitter so much. In terms of blogging, I'm probably lucky to get through a paragraph before my entire topic runs in a diametrically opposed direction!! See what I mean?

Today, I have a theory (or two) to share on racism/bigotry. Now, before I start, let me first establish that 1.) with me, "theory" and "opinion" are pretty close to synonymous, and 2.) I'm a common garden variety white girl. The closest I have ever come to personally experiencing racism or bigotry has been on behalf of my biracial son and in his defense. I do not pretend to understand the feelings and repercussions that follow being on the receiving end. I'm just spoutin' off about what I've observed and my theories about the jackasses on the giving end. I've given the topic a lot of thought due to the fact that my son is biracial. As his mother, I must at least attempt to understand, so I can help him navigate the world around him. (At least until he turns 18 and is outta my house... but that's a blog for another day).

In the scheme of things there is a continuum of bigotry (this is my beginning premise). I think to one extent or another, every one has a smidgen of it in us. It's about knowing where people fall on that scale. I'm gonna go out on a limb here and make a sweeping blanket statement: If someone (especially a melanin-deficient someone) says they "aren't racist" they are lying to themselves and/or you.

With that said, keep your hands and feet inside the vehicle... this train makes erratic stops and changes in direction. The management is not responsible for any damage to property, limb or mental health that may result from the following trip through my brain. Thank you and enjoy the ride.

First up is Mr. Blatant. He's the guy who calls you out of your name, to your face. He's the one who revels in stirring shit up and causing outrage. However, in a sense, he's the safest. HUH?? (Give me a minute, I'm going somewhere with this). He's a KNOWN COMMODITY. No shame in his game, he's a bigot and proud of it. His whole lifespace is filled with "I'm a racist, and what??" rhetoric and behavior. The point is, you can see him coming a mile away. And forewarned is forearmed. Clearly, he's on one extreme of the spectrum.

Next, we have Mr. Blatant's first cousin, Mr. Covert. His sentiments are identical to his cousin's, but he's a little more world savvy. This also makes him a lot more dangerous... he's the one who's gonna smile in your face and stab you in the back. He knows that his opinions and beliefs will be censured. He knows that he has to "make it look good." Unfortunately, this jackass likes to run for public office and shit. He usually gives himself away somehow, though. Be it through a slip of the tongue, or because he has a membership at some "exclusive" country club, or because he's just a little too willing to make excuses for Mr. Blatant. This guy is the first one to yell "reverse racism." He has spent much of the last 20 years or so hollering about how the real oppressed group is "white middle aged men." He gets nan from me but the side-eye.

Now, down the street and over a block we will wander into the neighborhood of Mr. and Mrs. Don'tGetOutMuch. I qualify the next statement by saying this: there is no such thing as harmless racism. The harm done may be unintentional, but that doesn't excuse the behavior, and they must be taught. These are the people that due to upbringing and circumstance haven't had their cultural horizons broadened. In other words, wasn't nan but white folks where they were raised. These are the ones who stupidly put their feet in their mouths, then jam those bad boys in far as they'll go trynna talk their way out of it. In their defense, a good number of these folks will at least try to change their evil ways once they realize they have evil ways that need changing. And not to rag on BET, but it doesn't help when the only exposure to a culture is less than stellar. And the Don'tGetOutMuch family usually gets their ideas about other cultures through media exposure.

On the other side of town is the Enlightened family. They are educated. They took Cultural Diversity, African American Studies, Women's Studies AND Comparative Religions in college, by gummy!! You can't tell them not a gatdamn thing. They will argue to the death that they have not a prejudiced, racist nor bigoted bone in their bodies. But they lie. Primarily to themselves. Just let's wait and see what happens when their little Enlightened progeny (who might actually be a little more enlightened than Mom n Pop) bring home a boy or girl friend who happens to be from a different culture. I'll tell you what will happen.... sphincter tone. The Enlightened's will suddenly turn into the tight-asses... at least until they have time to adjust. (Guess what house AmyMay grew up in....)

Next is my personal pet peeve.... the Wannabes. This is pretty self explanatory. Usually younger white people trying to jack culture to fill the void.... because, really, white folks,,, not a lot going on with ours. (Except for our penchant for doing dangerous and life threatening crap for no good reason... who swims with sharks?? I mean really...)

The thing with this group is that they convince themselves that they are sooooo damn "down" (word to Tanya Morgan) that they can do and say certain things with impunity. I'm sorry, but I don't care how long you've been best friends with Michelle Obama, if you are white, it is NOT cool for you to drop the N-Bomb. I don't care if your Black best friend introduces you as his/her n____, it is NOT ok for you to do the same when introducing him to your people. (And here's where my train of thought temporarily derails...white folks, ummmm, NO DREDLOCS, ever!! It ain't a good look for us...c'mon, now... y'all know I'm right).

Bringing us to the far end of the continuum.... the Reconciled To It clan. These are the people who honestly face the fact that racism, prejudice and bigotry are born of the fear of the unknown. They understand that despite their very best attempts and most sincere intentions, they will never be able to completely eradicate every last particle of racism from their beings. That does not mean that they won't attempt to continue to become better people. In fact, that's what marks them as different. They recognize the room for growth. They welcome encounters which broaden their horizons. And they feel like shit every time they catch the random racist bullshit that their human nature sometimes trips over.

I've tortured Alise with this theory before. And I'm pretty sure I didn't cover every "type" in this post, but dang, it's already long as hell! So I better quit before I get further behind. I hope reading this tome hasn't been too painful for anyone. I'm sure I'm bound to get a lot of disagreement on it, but hey, like I said... it's just a theory!

Update

I just wanna say that God is Good! Great and Awesome actually.

I posted about my friend and her newborn just a while back.  I felt it was only fair to those who don't know her to bring y'all up to speed.  The babe has had his surgery.  He came through it like a ROCK STAR!!

The alarms, meds, bells, whistles, and tubes are fallin' by the wayside in short order.  If he keeps doing as well as he is, he will be home sooner than later.  That doesn't mean he doesn't still need our prayers for continued healing, growth and health, or that mommy and daddy and sis don't need prayers for comfort, strength, and blessings.  But, man.... they have had a long journey in a short time and come a looooooong way!!

So thanks to everyone who said a prayer or kept a positive thought or sent positive energy their way.  Keep it up.

If you wanna read up on Congenital Diaphragmatic Hernia, click the link http://www.breathofhopeinc.com/

And remember, 

March 31 is National CDH Awareness Day!

Rock Turquoise in support of the babies and families affected by this condition!

Time for that talk again....Black HIV/AIDS Awareness Day

About a year ago, while schlepping around the intrawebs, I got to "know" some people who have irrevocably changed my life.  Good, bad or indifferent... it is what it is.  I put "know" in quotations b/c I have never actually met any of these ladies.  Yet we have shared some pretty deep conversations online.  Have discovered that we hold similar tastes, likes, values, beliefs, pet peeves and humor.  My friendships with these people are every bit as valid and valuable to me as any I have with people in my immediate vicinity.

Because of one of these friendships, I became involved with the Red Pump Project.  Look over on the sidebar... my humble lil' blog with its sporadic readership was one of the first to Rock the Red Pump, last March for National Women's and Girl's HIV/AIDS Awareness Day.  And I'm rockin' it again, and again, and again....

Today is Black HIV/AIDS Awareness Day.  And I personally think that it's the most important of the awareness campaigns going.  Why?  Because, demographically, Black Americans are unbelievably over represented as far as HIV/AIDS is concerned.  Now, my girl Luvvie has covered the stats in her post over at the RPP website.  And I believe if it ain't broke, don't fix it... so I'm gonna trust y'all will click the daggone links!

One stat that I came across deals with the disparity between pediatric AIDS among different ethnic/racial demographics.  The following tables come straight from the CDC website and they make me want to vomit.

FIGURE 2. Racial/ethnic distribution in total population and among infants aged ≤1 year, persons aged ≥13 years with diagnosed HIV* infection, and children aged <13 years with diagnosed perinatal HIV infection --- 34 states, 2004--2007^†

* Human immunodeficiency virus.

^† Data adjusted for reporting delays.

^§ Hispanics/Latinos might be of any race.

Alternative Text: The figure above shows racial/ethnic distribution in total population and among infants aged less than1 year and persons aged greater than 13 years with diagnosed HIV infection, and children with diagnosed perinatal HIV infection in 34 U.S. states from 2004-2007. During 2004-2007, among all children with diagnoses of perinatal HIV infection in the 34 states, 69% were black, 16% were Hispanic, 11% were white, and 4% were of other or multiple races. In contrast, 15% of infants in the 34 states aged less than1 year were black, 22% were Hispanic, 56% were white, and 7% were of other or multiple races. The percentages of black and Hispanic females aged >13 years with HIV infection were similar to those for children with diagnoses of perinatal HIV infection; 67% were black, and 14% were Hispanic.

FIGURE 1. Annual rate of diagnoses of perinatal HIV* infection per 100,000 infants aged ≤1 year, by race/ethnicity --- 34 states, 2004--2007^†

* Human immunodeficiency virus.

^† Data adjusted for reporting delays.

^§ Hispanics/Latinos might be of any race.

Alternative Text: The figure above shows the annual rate of diagnoses of perinatal HIV infection per 100,000 infants aged less than1 year, by race/ethnicity in 34 U.S. states from 2004-2007. From 2004 to 2007, the annual rate of diagnoses of perinatal HIV infection for black children decreased from 14.8 to 10.2 per 100,000 (p = 0.003), and the rate for Hispanic children decreased from 2.9 to 1.7 per 100,000 (p = 0.04). The rates for white children and for children of other or multiple races did not change significantly.

source

Yep, you read those stats right.  Disgusting.... 

At one point in the HIV/AIDS story, an infected mother automatically meant an infected infant.  But there are meds now, that when taken during pregnancy, can prevent the transmission of HIV from mother to child across the placenta.  And these tables are showing clearly that those meds are not getting to Black expectant mothers.  

And why?  Poor access to prenatal diagnosis and care?  Lack of information?  Lack of availability of meds that could prevent those infections?  Lack of caring?  Yeah, all that.  And more. 

So, what do we do about it?  We talk, yell, scream!  We get involved.  We start conversations about prevention.  We make this a priority topic again!  

I refuse to let the conversation die as long as I'm drawing breath.  Please get involved.  Use condoms.  Know your status.  Share information.  If we keep rowing the boat in the same direction, we can get those lines going in the right direction people!

By the way, the RPP has a brother organization, The Red Tie Project, with a focus on issues relating to men and HIV/AIDS.  Check them out!

Also check out this link... Pediatric AIDS Chicago Prevention Initiative for more info on perinatal transmission prevention.